weekend love by ifatma

A couple of years ago a very good friend of mine was asking himself a soul-searching question: “Do I actually love people?” You might say, what a stupid question! But think about it … do you?

As a leader, do you love people, or do you just use them? Do you care about them, or do you just command them around?

Leadership is relationship. You can command people to obey you because of your title or position, but you’ll only get them to follow you when they trust you. And they’ll only trust you when they know that you love them.

You know those timid rat-like little dogs – the kind that are always running away from people, and loud noises, and moving objects in general? A dog like that will never follow you – he’s too scared! Well, people are generally like that. But a dog that knows that you love him and will take care of him – he’s loyal, he’ll follow you, and he’ll make your life a joy.

Now, I’m a naturally task-oriented guy. To do lists, daily goals, weekly objectives, that’s how I function (sounds super boring doesn’t it?). “Task-mode” – as my wife calls it – is great when I’m in front of my computer, but it really sucks when I’m trying to lead people … as much as I’d sometimes like them to, humans don’t respond to commands like Microsoft Word does. Different kettle of fish.

Sometimes I get it right and give people acceptance and love – and they flourish! When I get it wrong, I don’t invest in the relationship and treat them like a program.

What’s your experience of love and leadership?


4 thoughts on “Do you actually love people?

  1. I have had some good but some bad but ultimately the best times have been when the leader (myself) has been modelling the heart of God besides trying to get a task done. I find we get lost in the doing and even purpose of something because we (have) really lost the heart of God and maybe we never connected with that intentionally before, and so when under pressure it does not come out unless we are consciously like, wow, I need to reflect the heart of God here. We are more prone to be drawn to accomplishing stuff as opposed to becoming like and glorifying God.

    There are many things that God is doing on the earth today and he has been doing for thousands of years. He has invested a lot in seeing it happen and risked his name and glory for centuries. We have failed him countless numbers of times and yet he calls us precious and delights in us.

    I am learning that sometimes God will bring us into teams not so much in order for you to accomplish stuff together but in order that life will be imparted from one person to another. By life I mean, motives, desires, ways of doing stuff, balance, wisdom, resources and ultimately a foundation of love upon which at a later stage a harvest of 100 fold can be reaped.

    • Thanks for your thoughts Lester – it’s so true that we as leaders can sometimes get lost in doing a task for God and in so doing lose the heart of God. How ironic!

      Thanks for your input in this conversation.

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